Sunday, January 27, 2008

thanks

I haven't listed any individual thank you's so far because I have been truly uplifted by everyone's comments. I look forward everyday to see what people are saying and each comment you leave is truly a monumental present to me, no matter how small the comment. This last week was a tough week. I felt okay yesterday, but am back to not feeling so great today. While I'm going to go get in the shower and enjoy a shake and be in a fine mood for the rest of the day, all your comments help, also.

I did want to list three individuals to thank because they are three people everyone should thank. The first is Robert Renninger. Robert and I are good friends and ran cross-country and track and field together in college (and together pushed each other into more trouble than Seattle U could handle). Also, Robert broke my 5,000 meters school record in track in field, although I don't think he ever beat me in any race in college and I still have the 10,000 meters record. (See previous post about what a harder race the 10,000 meters is.)

But it was Robert who suggested I start the blog and set everything up for me. This was a great idea and has really helped me out. Looking back, I can't imagine going through all this without having this blog. I probably wouldn't have written this thank you this early, but Lydia rightly pointed out that Robert deserved a lot of credit.

That reminds me of one story from college. The track team was flying from Seattle to Boise in a very small plane, the kind with two seats on either side, and I had an empty seat next to me. A few other runners did too. Well, Lydia (a runner on the team) comes up to me from the front of the plane and says "Paula, (with her baby Ellie) only had one seat and had to sit next to someone, and that I should switch with her." Well, of course I felt terrible so I went up to the front of the plane and switched with Paula, only to see that right nearby Lydia had her aisle to herself. I said Lydia, "why wouldn't you have just offered," and she said that is was my job as the captain. The only reason I tell this story is to point out that Lydia has a knack of getting me to do the right thing.

The second person to thank is my Uncle Jim. Every single song that was ever suggested on the comment boards was put on a brand new iPod nano. Whether or not he could get the song on iTunes or not, he tracked it down and put it on. And most of you have your songs on your own playlist! Shelli, that meant he even put the whole Juno soundtrack under your playlist. I am looking forward to listening to all the songs everyone suggested. Also, I was really touched by what an incredible act this was for Jim. It meant a lot to me and won't soon be forgotten.

Lastly, I want to thank Tim Pickrell. Tim has been the epitome of selflfess through this whole process. For those of you who don't know Tim, he is a friend of my dad's. Tim lives in Phoenix, but as he says, he votes and his heart is in Pima county (where Tucson is). He is very involved in the University and lived in Tucson for many years. He still has a house in Tucson in a beautiful area, the Catalina Foothills. For those not familiar with Tucson, the City is surrounded on really all four sides by mountains. But the closest are the Santa Catalina mountains, with Mt. Lemmon being the largest mountain in the Catalinas at about 9,150 ft. Several times a year snow will cover the entire mountains, and Mt. Lemmon has skiing every year. The southernmost ski lift in the entire United States is on Mt. Lemmon, with the ski resort being "ski valley." So you can come down to ski if you want! It is actually open now, but the vertical drop is only around 900 ft, so don't expect too much.

But, back to my point, "the Foothills" area is a beautiful area to relax in. The desert surroundings are untouched, with no grass yards or anything like that. There are javalina, bobcat, and all sorts of desert wildlife around. From the very start of all this, when I was diagnosed with cancer, Tim has let us stay here, and has pampered us by fixing up the place with big screen TVs and new furniture. I can't imagine having to do all this in my small studio apartment. I will publish some photos to show how cool the area is, and Tim, it has meant a huge difference in my recovery and treatment to be able to stay at your house.

Of course, I should mention the unsung heroes: my dad, my mom, and Jen who have really had to endure all the hard parts of this. Without them I couldn't do all this, and yet they get almost no gratitude from me because I am usually in a bad mood around treatment time. I just want to say thanks to you guys and that I truly couldn't do this without you. You are directly responsible for my future success.

Amie and Ryan have been great, driving down every weekend to keep me laughing; it is a very long drive for Amie. Like I said, there are many of you to thank, and you should all know how much I enjoy your cards, books, visits, soups...so much support. Please keep your comments coming because I really do look forward to your words of encouragement and anything else to make the day brighter.

Also: I do plan on a post on the state of the economy soon and an analysis of what the candidates are saying.

57 comments:

annabelle said...

Hey Scoob,
If your Uncle Jim is putting all the blog songs on an IPOD,tell him to put IT'S A BRAND NEW DAY by the Brophy scholastics. That's what I'm gonna be singing when you beat this. My love to you and Jen.

Dop said...

Well brother, that post made me cry. Athough I cry at TV shows like The Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders" (thats the one where 100 hopefulls compete to acheive their life long dream of becoming a dallas cowboys cheerleader) and American Idol commercials so I guess it doesn't take much. You are amazing to take the time to thank those that have done so much for you. And you are right, Tim is my hero.
I miss you so much brother.
Love you.

L'Jeane said...

Steve,
Thanks for the update. The photos of your surroundings, certainly are beautiful..a great place to heal!
I went to mass Friday, at SSJ,and it was the whole school mass..filled with the student body.Brought back memories of when Willie and Charlie were there..anyway, when they offered the prayers up for the day..YOU were on the list!! Imagine, the whole student body, and everyone else in the church, praying for you in one moment!

Doesn't get any better than that.You are so loved and cared for.I know your recovery will be smoother becaues of prayer.

Good luck, as you go forward into your third week.

I wish you calm moments,no pain, and good nurses!!

Hugs,
L'Jeane

Anonymous said...

Hi Baby,
I am just getting ready for bed, and wanted to write a quick note to
let you know I am in constant communication (one way of course) with Mother Teresa and God.

You are hitting some obstacles in your course, but you're still able to write to all of us and let us know what is happening....I'm amazed that you can do that....Let's celebrate each small success we can, like having a couple of weeks behind you!

Danny and Mary just left and Danny said that he sent your link to Lance Armstrong....apparently somewhere on your blog, someone from Lance's office wrote a note. Haven't had a chance to go through all the "comments" to find it. You may learn more from Danny.

Anyway, I was prepared for you to have a tough week, but can't really imagine how tough it must be. Danny and I are coming Tuesday to visit, not sure about Mooch. If you not feeling good enough to watch a movie, please don't worry, we will be happy to keep "Tiny" company...

You know how much we are thinking about you and Jen, your Mom, Dad, Rye Bread and Aime. We are praying for you all. Just remember how much we all love you, and can't wait for this period in your life to be a part of your past.

No words of wisdom tonight, only my deep love and support. Love you for always!

Aunt Lynnie

Rye Bread said...

Hey, T I should be in bed but just wanted to say I love you an to tell you that i wish that I could stay down there for longer with you, but unfortunately I think that they frown upon that in high chool. The positive though of the day is that you on't have to shave your beard again. I think if you just try and find the smallest most positive thing like that you will laugh and it will brighten your day. I love you, god bless, you night. Kalanikta saga po. Just a guess at how to spell it.

Adrian said...

Steve
I wish you a fourth week with as less pain and as much strength as possible. Thanks for the posting. Here is another poem for you:

A place to sit
Kabir

Don't go outside your house to see flowers.
My friend, don't bother with that excursion.
Inside your body there are flowers.
One flower has a thousand petals.
That will do for a place to sit.
Sitting there you will have a glimpse of beauty
inside the body and out of it,
before gardens and after gardens.

unclejim said...

Steven,

I am guessing that "shit, it's Monday again "can't begin to describe how you feel as the day dawns and another day of nasty chemo begins. I wanted to offer you some strength this morning and remind you that today too shall pass...in fact it is almost over here and I wish for you that it was over there too. You continue to be an inspiration to us and we continue to keep you in our thoughts daily.

We RUVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV you,
Elz and Pat

unclejim said...

I wish I could shoulder your burden. Although, I am sure I couldn't do it with near the strength you have shown. I think it is a testimony to who you are that you have so many people who are so supportive. Nothing tells more about the character of a person than those close to him. I just wish you didn't have to go through all of this to show that to us all. On the ride home, I felt more comfortable with angry songs as that was were I was at.

I wish I could send more than our prayers and love, but they will have to suffice.

GoldenAngelsWorks said...

Praying for your continuing progress in this tough race. I know you will be able to overcome whatever is in store next. I see you overcoming everything that life can throw at you with flying colors.

Aunt Mary said...

Sweet Steve,

As I walked onto campus this morning, Ron Douglas was just getting off his bike. He rides his bike every morning to school with his son Aiden, a first grader at St. Francis, in tow. He stopped to tell me what an outstanding young man Ryan was, and what a pleasure he was to have in class. He continued by saying "You know Mary, you really have an incredible family." I commented that while I was in complete agreement regarding the strength of my family and it's extended members, Ryan really is a product of a very special older brother and sister who have never failed to influence him with their sense of goodness and truth. And like his brother and sister, Ryan displays those same attributes. With that Ron looked at his son and said with a huge smile,"Steven was one of Brophy's finest runners."

As for giving thanks....Thank YOU so much for allowing us to witness and include us in your determination to fight this thing. I truly believe we will all be a tad more patient, a little less angry and most importantly grateful, for this incredible circle of support.

Jim, you are amazing for the timeless effort of gathering the songs and putting the playlists on the Ipod. But then, we've grown to expect no less..

Steven, I love you so very much. And I am a bit found of Jenny Rae Hawkins. Kisses to you both!

Shelli Stewart said...

Hey Stevey Steve! I don't know if you ever watch Family Guy but either way you have to see this clip. Make sure you watch the entire thing because the end (when Stewie comes on scene) is the funniest part. Enjoy!

http://www.spike.com/video/2807468

lindsayellen said...

hey cousin. im sorry i havent left anything in such a long time. i sure do miss you alot. i know this is hard (thats what she said) but if anyone can beat this its you. tell jen i love her and miss her too! i think about you nonstop. i cant wait to sit with you on mission beach.
i love you.
linds

Danny King said...

Steve:
I think that it is more appropriate that we thank you. It's easy for us to write a comment or two and view you blog (which I do compulsively...awaiting your econ forecast). Its takes much more effort and courage to talk openly and frankly about what is happening and how you are feeeling, and you have done so with strength, humor, and not a hint of pity. I guess this blog operates as a two way street. In a way it lessens our worries and concerns and gives us an avenue to connect with you and I hope it does the same for you. Hopefully I will see you tomorrow.

We should all thank Al Gore for inventing this wonderful medium known to some as the internets.

Danny

Mary Driscoll King said...

Hey Steve,

I too am sorry that I have not posted more often. It is certainly not because I don't think about you constantly but rather that everyone else has such inspirational posts and they tend to say what I am thinking more eloquently. Anyway, hang in there and keep posting because so many of us are finding inspiration and determination from you. I can't wait to hear your thoughts on the election/state of the economy and read the fiery posts that are sure to ensue with this family!

Love you,

Mary D.

Aaron Van Dyke said...

Steve,

So I'm a bit behind on the posting but that nurse story was just so over the top. I've seen nurses like that at our school's medical center. I though people had to go through training before becoming a health professional?! Well thankfully that's over. Praying that you continue to find the strength to get up and finish this race.

Peace!

DEP said...

Steven,
I have read all your post and keep "taking it all in" and "handing it all over" to the power, wisdom, compassion and goodness of Christ in the Eucharist when I am able to attend mass. How well you might know how He suffers when any of us suffer and uses our sufferings and trials to bring something greater and far more beneficial in the long run. He seems so close to you now, encouraging you through the special family and friends on this site. He allows us to be encouraged through you too! Thank you for your witness...your humanness. It is great getting to know your Dad's side of the family through this blog too. You have so many people pulling and praying for you...you can't lose no matter what! Love......Aunt Elaine

Mudge said...

Today you start your 2nd round of chemo and I am back in Phoenix selfishly thankful I can escape into work and not have to watch you go through this for a few days. I know we were told what to anticipate and it is all coming true. This last half of your race to beat this will be your hardest yet. It doesn't seem possible for it to get worse, but "it's always the darkest just before dawn". Are you hearing a little Mama's and the Poppa's tune in your head? I am grateful as well for this blog since it enables you a way to stay connected with people you cannot see and discuss things with. You have no way of knowing how many people are reading it daily. I would like to reiterate, if you are reading this and have not posted anything it truly is the highlight of Steven's day to read the comments. Many people ask, "What can I do?" Posting a comment to let him know you are out there and checking in is the best thing. Love you T, Mom

Mudge said...

Oh, one more thing...Aaron (Van Dyke), if you are Steven's friend from Seattle U that made that fabulous bread pudding one night (along with jambalaya that far outdid my cheese enchiladas) I so want that recipe. It's one of those times in my memory where I keep going back to how good it was. I think it was the sauce poured on top. That, and the food at that weird little hole in the wall soul food place near campus...so YUM! If you post or send it I will make it for Steve when he is healed. Jean - Steve's mom

Anonymous said...

Hi Baby,

I am suppose to be on my way to Tucson, but Danny said last night that you don't finish your chemo today until 2:30 and Dan has a childbirth class at 6:30...so I am planning on coming down this weekend with Mooch. I would have asked Danny to miss his class, but Mary Beth said that Danny is struggling with learning the breathing techniques. I wouldn't want a repeat of 1st grade, when Danny "flagged" the class. He also said that Teddy (my other love)is coming to visit you today after your chemo.

So, lucky for you, I have some more "words of wisdom" from Mother Teresa.

She said " My thoughts often run to you who suffer, and I offer your sufferings, which are so great, while mine are so small. Those of you who are sick, when things are hard, take refuge in God's heart. There my own heart will find with you strength and love".

I think from reading all the posts that so many of us have found your strength and love. I agree with Jim, that I imagine all of us adults wish that we could step in and handle this "time" for you. But for some reason, God is pushing you to realize your own strength, and I know he will be pleased to see just how much strength and will you possess.

I am disappointed that I can't kiss you today, but imagine a light kiss on your cheek from Aunt Lynnie, because I am imaging it myself.

I'm glad that another chemo treatment will be behind you today, and I will celebrate that success. Jenn, Tom and Jean, thanks so much for taking care of my nephew. I love you all so much!

Love you for always,
Aunt Lynnie

edward said...

Mok

There is a quote from Kevin Spacey's character in the movie American Beauty which says something along the lines of, "There's so much beauty in the world that sometimes I don't think I can stand it." I thought that the first time I saw Half Dome from Yosemite Valley and upon first view of the friendly confines of Wrigley Field. I thought that the first time I saw your baby brother, perfect despite all expert prediction, laying in your dad's arms and when the woman in Oaxaca who was living in a shack of scrap wood and corragated sheet metal, with her mentally deficient son offer me "un regalo" in the form of a straw hat.
I remember this feeling when you and I took the detour through Steinbeck country to get back to the I-1 were greeted with the most majestically beautiful piece of highway I've ever seen. And, of course, the first time Tom brought home bean and cheese burros from an unfamiliar little Mexican food place called "Filiberto's."

I know that such a view of the world through a radiation mask may not be so rosy and that the impossibility of not being able to shed your frustration with a long run only augments it. It's a fact that as the later rounds come, it's going to be increasingly hard to keep those gloves up. If anyone can go the full 10, Steve, it's you.

The best instruction I've ever received in my life was from my aunt Lynn, who told me that the only way to get through troubled times is to always have something to look forward to- always. I can't wait until the first of the Cardardies becomes a dad (Hopefully his daughter in her nascent years resembling more her mom) and until the rest of us (probably packy next) follows suite. I can't wait for the ecstacy of smelling the Pacific for the first time this summer. I can't wait to kick your ass in our first marathon together. More than anything else, however, I look forward to, 20 years from now, looking back on this experience and acknowleding that we are all stronger and better people for having to have gone through this. See you in a few hours, dude.
Theo

annabelle said...

Dear Jen,
I want to thank you for the tender caring, support, determination to find out everthing about this horrible disease, but most of all for being in Steven's life. If I've learned anything in my 77 years, it's love conquers all.

Hang in there. I love you.

draye said...

Mrs. Manos (8:33) has now demonstrated that it is not, in fact, only my own mother who can leverage guilt to make me do what I should have done anyway. I am a blog free rider. That said, I think the reason I enjoy reading this blog even when Steve has not posted anything new is that the many comments are a reflection of how widely and deeply one good guy can reach. Additionally, I feel like I should be jotting down some of the more intriguing allusions in order to follow up later and get the whole story.
Steve, suffice it to say that your reflections are a welcome moment of pause. It's almost a prayer to read what you are thinking and inevitably reflect on what a wonderful gift your wit and mind are for all of us. Finally, I join the crowd calling for your state-of-the-economy post and vow to turn over a new leaf on my comment habits whenever it arrives.
All my best,
Dom

Adrian said...

I liked the idea in this clip so I thought to pass it to you, hopefully it will make you smile. You should listen to audio as well even if it's in French I am sure you will get it:
http://www.mensup.fr/usbwine/usbwine.swf
Adrian
PS: I finally went to a doctor today for my come and go flu and she gave me some antibiotics (she pronounced the by now well known word VALLEY FEVER as a possibility that I immediately rejected) so I guess it will still be a while until I will be able to see you without putting you in danger of getting some nasty virus. Can't believe people from all over are coming here and I am in Tucson and I can't see you. At least I know you're in good hands.

Dop said...

I miss you T

Dop said...

Go immediately and download "Pray for Grace" by Michael Franti and Spearhead

Rye Bread said...

I believe that "Free Reading" is illegal in 28 different states I believe.

Rye Bread said...

Hey, I forgot to tell you that if you are looking for a laugh to watch Rob and Big tonight at 8:30 on MTV. I love you!

Anonymous said...

Hi Baby Doll,

I think the bunkhouse is calling me...and I am heading upstairs to bed, and to say my prayers. But I wanted to say good night and I am glad that another day of treatment has passed. I hope you weren't really sick today. Tomorrow is a new day.....You can make it.....I will write more tomorrow...Love to you and Jen....

Aunt Lynnie

P.S. I'll love you forever!

The Chadds said...

Steve,
Your blogs put me to shame – I don’t have anything to write to you that’s more inspirational that what you have written. I do, however, have a list that should make you laugh. My sophomore year in college I was given the opportunity to run in Regionals for Cross Country. I was really excited because it was in Tucson…the closest I would get to running a race near home. Well, I bombed…big time. The only way I knew how to get over it was to laugh about it. So I sent the list below to the unfortunate people that had cheered for me. I’ve only written two funny documents in my life. The other one is about Applied Behavior Analysis . . . I thought you might enjoy this one a bit more. So, in my effort to at least put a smile on your face, here is “The Top Ten Clues That You Are the Last Runner.”
10. You fall down in the first one hundred meters and you don’t get trampled.
9. You’re getting run over by the follow-up golf cart.
8. With 1K to go, you notice that the course is deserted except for your family.
7. Officials let the golfers resume their game.
6. Your finish-line cup of water is warm.
5. The shorts of those that peed their pants are already dry.
4. All of the front-runners are no longer in critical condition.
3. People are afraid to talk to you after the race . . . including your coach.
2. Someone asks how many people ran the race and you know the exact number.
1. Two words: Pity Clap

I know you can’t relate because you have always worked hard enough to be at the front of the pack, but like I said above, sharing my embarrassment with everyone reading this blog is worth it if it so much as makes you smile. Have a good day Steve!

unclejim said...

I can easily relate to Bethany's experience, much more so than I can to any of Steven's races. I ran my first marathon under the number of my college roommate, Steve Geare. Steve had entered and then gotten sick a week before the race. I didn't know if I had trained enough but went for it anyway. Now, all who know me know that I will never be mistaken for my anorexic brother Tom. And all who have ran in an organized race should be familiar with the picture that follows a week or so later of you finishing, which they obviously do my the number on your shirt. Well, I got my letter from Steve instead of the race organizer as of cource they wouldn't know that number 8563 belonged to anyone but the person who registered for it. My picture came with this little note, " Jim, I received this picture of a little chubby guy crossing the finish line at the Scottsdale Marathon."

In my crowning athletic achievement, I got so little love.

Steve, if you are still reading this blog, I still consider that one of the funniest letters I have ever received.

Having so little vanity helps you enjoy the humor in life around us.

Diane said...

Hi Steve, This is Aunt Diane again checking in to see how you are getting on. Do you still have to deal with Nurse Ratchett? I love reading your blogs. I sure do love you lots! Hang in there. You are in my prayers daily. I wish that I could do more for you. May you heal wholly and quickly. God bless you. Love,
Aunt Diane

Cindi said...

Hey Steven, This is your aunt coming to you from the silent frozen north. I just wanted to say how proud I am of you and in awe of your strength. Your experience as a runner has obviously taught you endurance. This is a race that you are not running alone though. I read your blog everyday and it comforts me to know that you have so many loved ones around you. Jen is a God send. I truly believe this with all my heart. I hope you are having a good day. Your grandma in heaven must be smiling because all her daughters are finally saying the rosary everyday. It is the least I can do for you.

Aunt Mary said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Aunt Mary said...

Hey Sweetie,
I have decided to answer Ted's challenge to the marathon. I have a picture of you running a race in Seattle posted on my treadmill. With those legs of yours and Lindsay's less than appropriate but truly motivating music blasting through my Ipod, I think I just may be ready. The one obstacle that may present itself is sweet Ryan who, like his aunt, shares a passion for Dairy Queen blizzards; a passion we have been indulging far too much of late.

So many at Brophy ask about you daily. You have touched the lives of so many, Steve. Hang in there!
I love you mucho!

unclejim said...

It is nice to see that Mary feels so strongly about running a marathon that she posted her comment twice. Actually, I am glad to see I am not the only one who finds the skewed letters difficult to decipher.

I also owe Amy half an apology. Posting a Michael Franti song earns her kudos. On the iPod I gave you, there is a "Peace" playlist that contain a couple of his songs. He is one of the best around right now. The Peace playlist is an exceptional one, in my not very humble opinion.

I was thinking that you ould send the iPod home with Tom every other weekend or so, and I can update it so the list is complete. I love that people continue to come up with ideas.

As I am typing this, the song Elz and Pat walked down the aisle to came on my iPod. It should be included on your list. Tish Hinojosa's "Baby believe". I don't think they would mind sharing it.

lauren grant said...

hi steven...or as i first knew you, scooby,

remember when our families all used to go camping together? and remember that one time, long ago, when we found that tee-pee on one of our exploration walks? i think teddy and maybe ellen may have been on that particular camping trip. ellen had the BIGGEST mickey mouse (or maybe minnie) stuffed animal i have ever seen. (i think it was ellen...)

my mom and dad still have all those pics. you were such a cute kid, and i was so...well not cute. what were my parents thinking with my bowl cut and the bangs that began at the back of my head??? oh well!

as danny posted so accurately, i too should be thanking you for your blog. i check it often, and think about you (and i know my mom, dad, megan, and mark do too; although i believe they are silent blog readers). as i prepare for my exams (exactly 30 days away), your words of perseverance, courage, and honest acknowledgment of how difficult things are for you right now are so inspirational. reading your blog reminds me that a 72 hour written exam, and a 3 hour oral exam over 300 books are NOTHING! i can do it! it certainly won't be fun, but i will get through it. AND, just think how easily and confidently you will fly through your phd exams too, once you have beaten this "exam."

annabelle said...

Hey Steven,

Went to Mary's last night for dinner. While she was on the telephone with Linds, I asked her to ask Linds the meaning of her blog (botch) which I had tried to look up in the dictionary. They stopped laughing enough to define it for me. I guess I"m just not with it.

Hope this week is going fast for you. The last three days at the Y they have been playing "rescue me" over and over. Don't know if that is the name of the song but it sure has me thinking of you. Wish I could rescue you and sail San Diego bay. The time will come.

Love to you and Jen.It has to be hard (understatement) but do your best to keep your spirit up.
I love you, Scoob....Maw Maw

Anonymous said...

Hi Baby,
Just got home from work and decided it was probably time to share some more of Mother Teresa's wisdom.....I hope you aren't making faces and wishing for something more entertaining.

I shared this one with my family at dinner one night and Billy said that it was the first time I've read a "pearl of wisdom" from Mother Teresa that I didn't cry. And perhaps the reason I didn't cry is that usually when I read something she has said, it is something that I need to work on, or strive for....but this phrase is something that we as a family have achieved, and I think we all know how lucky we are to have all the cousins, aunts, uncles, and of course Moochie.

I guess I am doing this backward. So here's what Mother Teresa said about parents and their children, "Everybody today seems to be in such a terrible rush, anxious for greater development and greater riches, so that children have very little time for thier parents, and parents have very little time for their children and for each other. So peace in the world can begin at home".

I think of all the times I have been surprised that you kids would want to spend as much time with us parents as you have, especially at the beach.

I think of the sacrifices that your parents are making now to be with you. I think that it says so much about your parents and family-(that would be you Amie and Rye Breadie), and your soulmate Jen.

I'm sure that 30 years from now, you would be doing the same for your children. I have no doubt.

I also know the person you are and you're sensitivity to all. So when I read your post on "thanks", it reiterated what I knew about you.

Moochie and I are planning a visit on Saturday. We are going to get a hotel room so that we can spend sometime with you all on Saturday, and the visit on Sunday before we head back home. If you are not feeling well, I'm sure mama Jean and I will find lots to talk to each other about....

Love you forever, and I am so proud of the young man you have become.

P.S. I was thinking on the way home that we will have to find a large "party" place to celebrate you're good health. From reading this blog every morning and night, I'm beginning to realize just how many people love you...(however I am not surprised.)

Jenny Hawkins said...

Congratulations on a strong 18 treatments -- 17 more to go! I know you are so uncomfortable and tasks can be overwhelming, but your body is cleaning house. Obviously the challenges will keep coming. Face them head on and know you can overcome them! All your supporters, your Carnation and Ensure, your six scoops of glutamine, Peg the tube, your powerful radiation and your 5-fu fanny pack are fighting those weak cancer cells with you! We can do it! The green machine always comes out on top! Everyone keep sending your positive thoughts and energy this way.

Mudge said...

So, does this mean we have passed the "hump day" you marked on the calendar? Yea, everyone loves to get over the hump!
Note to Dominic and my sister in the land of 10,000 lakes: Catholic guilt is alive and well and that's a good thing. Oh, and Cindi, happy birthday.
If the various names you are reading confuse you about who's who, this family is famous for substituting not just one nickname for people, but several. Hence, you'll see Steven referenced as Mokey, Scoob, or TT. Tom as Tiny, me as Mudge. Amie as Doppie,(the list of names Steven has given her could go on and on) Annabelle (grandma) as Moochie, Ryan as Rye Bread or Podie, cousin Patrick as Wacky...That's just a few I remember being used over the many blogs left in case people wanted clarification. And if Perky's are reading this...lol

lindsayellen said...

good morning t-
well, i just finished a run, something i havent done in awhile. my mom taped a picture of you running on the treadmill, which i'll have to admit, creeped me out a little at first. As it turns out though, that picture kept me on the treadmill for an extra mile. Everytime i got tired i looked at you and was reminded of how hard you're working at beating this disease and how exhausted you must feel.
i will never forget being the last one at, lets face it, pretty much EVERY cross country meet i ever ran in. i remember so clearly you and ben and tony and the rest running beside me, cheering and screaming and telling me not to give up.

at the time i wanted to punch you in the face.

but now i look back on the very fondly and appreciatively. you were always such a role model for me and i was always so proud of you.

keep fighting the good fight.
love you.
linds

unclejim said...

I don't believe for an instant that Lindsay has changed the way she looks upon your encouragement during her races. My guess is that those encouragements should still be given at arm's length.

I have discovered another bad side to this whole cancer thing. I was on my bike yesterday finishing the end of a windy 17 mile ride. I turned west and had the wind blowing directly in my face. Could I complain? Hell no. Today my back sent me home. Can I complain of the pain. Hell no.

After watching the stoic way you have handled this mess, there is no way any of us can ever complain again.

Hmmm, on second thought, maybe that is a good thing to come from this cancer mess.

Still thinking of you constantly.

Anonymous said...

Hi Baby,
I was so thankful for Jen's post, it does seem appropriate to celebrate...I know you aren't feeling good enough to celebrate, but I will have a shot of tequila for you and Jen.

I am so proud of you reaching this milestone. CONGRATS to you whole team!!!! Can't wait to kiss you cheek, I promise it will be a very soft kiss....No words of wisdom from Mother Teresa tonight...we are celebrating. Can't wait for you to feel good enough to celebrate with me. I'm sure if I read more from Mother Teresa, she would say something like "Tequila helps suffering and strenghtens your faith".

I will see you on Saturday...with the Mooch. I will leave my prayer books at home. Until then, my love and constant thoughts....

Love you forever,
Aunt Lynnie

Greg said...

Good Morning, Moke -
Ever since I was a little kid it's been easier to get up on Fridays than any other day because of the excitement that it's almost a weekend - no school, no work. I hope there's at least a glimmer of that feeling for you this morning knowing that this miserable week is almost over. There are a lot of people that would do anything to lighten the load for you if we could.
In honor of Super Bowl Weekend. I forwarded you a link Danny Novak sent me from youtube that will give you a good laugh. Hang in there, Moke, it's almost the weekend. Love you, Nephew. Greg

Happy Birthday, Jim!

Toni L. said...

Hi Steve,
My name is Toni Lewis and I am Steve Geare's younger sister. Steve told me about your diagnosis and sent me the link to your blog and I have been following your journey ever since your second post. In fact I check your blog several times a day and am blown away by your courage, your honesty and your tenacity! I am also deeply touched by the love and support of your family and friends. You have an incredible family Steve! I know your Mom and Dad through my brother Steve but it has been several years since we last saw each other. I also remember your Aunt Lynne and Aunt Mary from Xavier High School. I believe your Aunt Mary and I had a class together - It was either Ms Steffes Art Class, Mrs. Davies Biology or Ms.Irwin's Home Ec. I remember her as a very funny girl. She taught me the meaning of the word "Pungent". Unfortunately I cannot repeat the story she told using this word because it was a tad gross but whenever I hear the word "pungent" I think of Mary Manos! Your Dad may not remember this but in May or June of 1979 I was on my way to ASU to take my very last final and had a car accident on 3rd street and about Campbell. He was on his way to work and saw the accident and stopped to help me out. He was so calm and encouraging. I just wish my Dad had acted in the same manner!

I have been wanting to write ever since I started reading your blog but it was your mom's appeal to send words of encouragement that did the trick.(Thank you Jean) So Steve, I want you to know that my husband and I are holding you and Jen and your family up in prayer and will continue to do so until you have conquered this battle. Romans 5:3-5 says "We know that suffering produces perseverence, perseverence, character and character, hope! And hope does not disappoint us. Thank you for allowing us to be part of your journey! You are a remarkable young man!

I also have a song suggestion for your Ipod. "Praise You In This Storm" by Casting Crowns.
God Bless!
Toni Geare Lewis

Aunt Mary said...

Sweet Moke,
I had dinner with the Mudge last night and she told me things were getting really tough. While my treatment was fourteen years ago and not near as intensive as yours, there are a few instances I remember with great clarity. I think I mentioned the guy who resembled Einstein that would draw blood before each of my treatments. He was very stoic, never saying much. On one dreadfully nauseous day, when I was feeling like there was no way I could go another round, Einstein looked at me and quietly said,"Mary, I have never been through this, and I can't begin to understand what you must feel like. But if you could try to imagine the chemicals and the radiation as your allies in this battle, the treatments may be a tad easier to endure. Become one with the treatments but together fight the disease." I thought...Right. But I can't tell you how many times from that moment on, how much I thought about that perspective. I knew I had to complete the regiment and reflecting on his words was a powerful thing for me.

I long to be with you. But inspite of my not physically being there, you know I send everything I have your way. Kisses to your forehead.
Jenny, I miss and love you, and again thanks for everything you do. Somehow, thanks doesn't begin to touch it...

unclejim said...

I guess we all knew the day would come when things went over the top. I kept hoping it wouldn't but now hope that your strength, our love and prayers will get you through it. I wish so much that there was more we could all do, that somehow you could pass the baton for a day or so. But it is ultimately your fight. We are just the cheering section.

I talked with my doctor today and she said that what I needed to realize is that as awful as your treatment was, it will give you a long life. That may not be much consolation right now, but it is the reason to keep pushing on. You have fought many a battle with a lot less on the line.

I don't know if running has the equivalent of basketball's sixth man, but whatever you would call it, we are rasing the roof in your support right now.

Danny King said...

Steve:
I am Civil Procedure II right now, and I should be paying attention, but your blog is a little more captivating (the evils of having the internet in class). Just wanted to say hello. Also, I am just finishing an econ book I picked up for $5. Its called the "Economic Naturalist" by Robert Frank. Its good because he dumbs things down to my level. If you want/need any more reading I'll bring it down.

Danny

lindsayellen said...

good morning teeter. im about to get on that treadmill again and i'll be thinking about you the whole time.

in response to uncle jim's post...i think he should speak for himself when it comes to the complaining issue...i've become pretty good at it and its really not something im ready to give up..but i do see his point.

im really anxious to come see you again but the man's really gotten me down and i havent had a weekend off in quite some time. next opportunity i get though i would love to make the trek, depending on how you're feeling. i hope you have as good a day as possible. love to you and jen.
linds

Mary Driscoll King said...

Hey Steve,

I too think about you constantly. Whenever I want to complain about how I cannot see my own toes (not that I would want to because they are incredibly swollen) or when I cant sleep because my back hurts too much, I think about you and your strength and suddenly nothing is that bad anymore. You are more than half way and that is worth celebrating!

Love to you and Jenn,

Mary D.

kparise said...

Hey Steve,

Your wonderful Aunt Mary has been keeping me updated on your treatment. Sounds like you are in the middle of HELL and I am sorry about that. Truly. Sometimes life seems so unfair. There are a few things I have learned, though...that hope is eternal and that someone as incredible as you can BEAT this. I have heard so many amazing stories about your strength and fortitude that there really isn't a question about how you personally are approaching this phase of your life. Please know, and I think you do, that you are never alone. You have the most amazing family I have ever known...next to mine. Sorry..had to say that. In all seriousness, Take advantage of their love and attention...when you can. When you just don't want anyone around, pray. Swear. Whatever gets you through the day. All the Parise's are thinking of you...and praying each and every day.

Anonymous said...

Hi Baby,

I am just getting a hot cup of java, and thought that I would check in with you. I've heard this has been a horrific weak for you and it makes me so sad. I wish there were words, gestures anything that would make you feel better, but I know that we can all cheer you on and pray for you, wake up thinking about you, and go to bed thinking about you, but ultimately this is your fight.

I feel helpless tonight and feel that I don't have any words or wisdom that will help right now. Just remember there are so many people that love you so much, and are praying for you almost constantly. My love to you & Jen, you Dad & Mom, and Dop and Rye Breadie.

Love you forever...

P.S. Happy Birthday to Uncle Jim!

Unknown said...

Steve,

This would be about the time in a race where I would start to get loud and a little more creative with my vocabulary.

Get after it!

Brian

Unknown said...

Hi Steve,

Hang in there... you can do this.

I want to share with you a school story. I was in my office, getting on a student's case about behavior and attitude. The student storms out saying something like I can't stand this school and I hate the principal.

When I followed out into the hall, I encountered Mikey with a Steve in college, chest sticking out, finger pointed stance (Brian tells me that you were just imitating Kramer), telling the student to calm down and something like, "Don't you realize man that she's just trying to help you...."

I immediately realized how much you have influenced those around you, and want you to know the impact that your leadership has had on those who spent hours daily with you in college.

Aunt Mary said...

Mok,
I woke up this morning just like every other thinking about you. The Brophy Broncos slow pitch softball team suffered a humilating loss last night which dropped my spirits just a bit, pale in comparison, but you know how competitive your aunt Mary can be!

I hopped on my treadmill and had a really awesome run. Very pleasantly, I ended my run to a song that we mutally agree to be one of the best songs ever written...Tom Waits.."Hold On." I really felt you right there with me. Your picture on my treadmill helps!!!!

Love you so.

Adrian said...

Hey Steve
Congrats for another week of treatment. I guess this one was harder but I hope you keep up. Only 3 weeks left!
Thinking constantly of you and your "journey".
Enjoy the Super Bowl!
Adrian

The Dude said...

Dude here...

1.Oregon Trail: not to offend anyone, but i kicked arse at that game. I always left as a poor farmer(i.e. less sh#@ to carry in your wagon)
and i never ''bought'' food, I bought bullets
and I killed buffaloes(sorry buff) whenever a wagon wheel broke.

And if you can't fjord a river, you don't belong in the northwest.

2.Songs: Hells Bells of course, but when you get out of this one steve, you will realize that "fat bottomed girls" really do make the rockin' world go round.

-"you never even called me by my name" by David Alan Coe because Steve,
the cavalry "never minded standing..in the rain"

3.Dominic Draye will be voting for Hillary Clinton, why? he truly wants 30 yrs of dual-family rule!!

4.Will someone please tell the American Dollar to harden the F*&^ Up, i'm getting killed over here in the big Down Under with exchange rates

5.So, steve, does all this ''cancer'' stuff mean i can finally go on a run with you and drop you?

-Dude abiding in the Down Under