A few few weeks ago I was faced with the decision of what to do as far as treatment goes. I could stay with my current oncologist, but he was going to leave after a month and I would would be left with no one in Tucson. So I decided to meet with a family friend who is an oncologist in Phoenix, to get his opinion. I really like his plan, so we are going with it. It involves 2 chemo drugs as well as one drug that works like chemo but technically it not.
Unfortunately my body had a very adverse reaction to the chemo and I ended up in and out of the hospital 4 times, which was pretty tough. So I had to take a lower dose of chemo this last time. Hopefully everything goes well !!!!
I am just happy to be home for an extended period of time and not in the hospital!
January in Sabino Canyon
just before radiation started- on Jen's birthday
Sabino Canyon on hike
Part of the Catalina Mountains
the cavalry on the attack
2001 emerald city invite
95 comments:
So wonderful to see you post Steve.
Prayers and thoughts go with you as you start on this treatment plan.
Steven! It is so good to see your post! I have been praying for you . . . hugs and kisses! I love you.
Steven,
It was so great to see your post. I continue to believe in your fighting spirit, and I am ever impressed by your grace in this challenge that you have undertaken. You are in my thoughts and my prayers, and as always I am sending all of my positive energy your way...although I have a sneaking suspicion that you are having no problem finding plenty of that around you.
My love to you and all of your family.
love,
Casey Scott
Keep fighting Steve. We're praying for you.
Kevin
It's so great to see you post. It is truly amazing to witness how many people are behind you in this fight. We love you so much!
Steve -
It was good read another post from you. I am writing to also let you know that a prayer intention for your healing and strength is posted in the the Jesuit Community at Seattle U.
Peace to you ...
Mike Bayard, SJ
Hi Steven,
It's great to read a post from you, I think of you and read your blog everyday. You are definitely in my thoughts and prayers!
I hope you are surrounded by all the people you love today, I wish I could give you a big hug right now.
I was thinking back to our childhood the other day...do you remember when my parents rented that camper and you, Matt, Amie and I stayed in there playing games for hours? Monopoly I think. And you always thought Amie was cheating. Or how about the time Danny put shaving cream in Matt's ears! That was terrible but still makes me smile.
I love you.
Kimmy
Hey Steve,
I went for a run the other day and thought about you, so I went an extra mile in your honor - although it was still nowhere near the 13 miles you used to call an easy day. We are all praying for you and are so proud of the courage with which you are facing this. Best of luck with the new treatment plan; we will continue thoughts and prayers for you.
Sweet Steve,
Not a day passes that I don't have someone inquiring about you.
Whether in the grocery store,or one of the many awesome individuals I work with at Brophy, my college roommates, etc. everyone has hopped on board as you continue to battle.
I am completely amazed when I see you, and I know how uncomfortable you are most of the time, and yet you always manage a thumbs up or a smile. I can't help myself kissing that sweet head of yours, far too many times in one visit, I suspect, but you make a point of expressing your graditude at my being there. You have waged a fight unlike any I have ever witnessed. While it doesn't surprise me or anyone else that saw the dedication you displayed in your running, it is nonetheless staggering to watch you perservere.
You are my hero.....and I love you more than you could possibly know....
Steven, seeing you and Jen makes my heart sing. Wish all who write on your blog cluld see what love is. You two make me believe love conquers all and I believe your courage and Jen's nursing will see this through. How lucky you two were to find each other and what a terrible ordeal this would be without each other. You guys are an inspiration to all of us, young and old. Steven, I love you, Jen you are truly and angel and I couldn't love you more.
This blog comes to you because of the kindness of Danny and Billy, who put my computer back in order. Thanks guys.
So happy to see you post Steven. I know your mom must be happy too! She is amazing and really came through last Wednesday night at your rosary when I was looking for an opening prayer ... she just opened her purse and pulled out a much used stack of prayer cards then found the prayer to St. Anthony, which Ryan read so well.
We continue gather to pray for you on Wednesdays at 7 p.m. at Ss. Simon & Jude Church (inside now where it's cool). Whoever is in town should just show up ~ 27th Ave. north of Bethany Home Road. This is the place to be on Wednesday nights!
O Holy St. Anthony, gentlest of Saints, your love for God and Charity for His creatures made you worthy, when on earth, to possess miraculous powers. Miracles waited on your word, which you were ever ready to speak for those in trouble or anxiety. Encouraged by this thought, I implore of you to obtain for me the healing of Steven Manos. The answer to my prayer may require a miracle. Even so, you are the saint of Miracles.
O gentle and loving St. Anthony, whose heart was ever full of human sympathy, whisper my petition into the ears of the Sweet Infant Jesus, who loved to be folded in your arms, and the gratitude of my heart will ever be yours. Amen
That she is, Annabelle. Jen is an Angel, and Steven is the luckiest man in the world to have found her. Our family is blessed to be able to witness what she does for him. When she comes around gently rubbing his arm saying, "What's up Sunshine?" he smiles back at her, and at that moment, the world just seems better. Jean
Hi Baby Doll,
David cooked dinner for Moochie and me tonight. I think Mooch felt guilty that neither one of us worked today, and David did, and he was the one that cooked. I didn't feel too quilty....I actually enjoyed it!
Moochie said she was giving you a rub down today, and I think she is going to stop by tonight to finish...she said she didn't get your back, so you may see her again tongiht.
Talking about angels, your Moochie is the mother of angels. You have always treated her so well, and loved her so much....she has a special place in her heart for you...and Jen.
I love you and Jen so much. I hope you have a painless night with a few smiles for the family. I am so proud of you, soft hugs and kisses.
Love,
A.L.
I love you Steven.
A.L.
Totally just had a dream about you, so I had to check out your blog, glad to see your post yo. Good luck to you, your family, and Jen.
As Always,
Madison
Hi Moke,
Didn't stop by after Lynn's dinner (really David's) because I had Roxy in the car and it was too hot to leave her. I called to see if you were up for a gentle massage, but couldn't get anyone. I know you were at the doctor's today and will call Jen or Jean for the latest news. I guess another blood transfusion is in the works. No one fights harder or complains less than you . You are truly amazing and I love you soooooooooooo much.
Hi Baby Doll,
It was so nice to see you and Jen and the family last night. I sure enjoyed the smiles. I'll ask Mary Beth and Mooch to post their pictures.
I love you all so much and constantly think of soft kisses and hugs....
Peace and love,
A.L.
Steve
I am reading your blog from Romania and I was positively surprised to see you posted. I hope your treatment goes as painless and efficient as possible. I am thinking of you constantly. I will go to a monastery in a couple of days, there will be some prayers for you from this part of the world as well.
Best thoughts for you, Jen and your family.
Just a reminder that we continue to pray the rosary for Steven on Wednesday nights even in the summertime. The Church is cool, and the gathering of friends is comforting. Come pray with us at 7 p.m. at Ss. Simon and Jude Church if you are in town. If you're not, take a few minutes to pray at 7 p.m. from wherever you are. Imagine how powerful that will be. The post from your friend in Romania made me realize how many people are praying for you all over the world. At last week's rosary, Ryan read the opening prayer to St. Peregrine, patron saint of cancer patients.
O great St. Peregrine, you have been called "The Mighty", "The Wonder Worker" because of the numerous miracles which you obtained from God for those who have turned to you in their need. For so many years, you bore in your own flesh this cancerous disease that destroys the very fiber of our being.
You turned to God when the power of human beings could do no more, and you were favored with the vision of Jesus coming down from His cross to heal your affliction. I now ask God to heal Steven Manos. Aided by your powerful intercession, I shall sing with Mary a hymn of gratitude to God for His great goodness and mercy. Amen.
Hi Steve,
I am glad to see that you are bloging again. I think about you all the time. You are so very special. I hope and pray that your treatments will be truly effective for you. Keep the faith. I am praying for you. Love you lots!
Hugs and kisses,
Aunt Diane
Steven had a good weekend and even got out of the house for a few hours to visit his grandma, Annabelle, on the 4th. It was a nice treat to see him getting in the car to go somewhere other than the doctor's office or hospital. The chemo has not yet taken the harsh toll it did last time...platelets were good last week, so no bleeding, red blood was down, but he got a transfusion on Thursday, and they gave him medicine to take care of the rising calcium levels which wrecked havoc on his body in May. His doctor is out of town and I feel as if, for right now, God is letting him just rest peacefully until Dr. Paul gets back. I don't know what we'd do without his and his staff's help. Last Thursday, when Steve went to his 9:30 appointment, he got his treatment and we left there @ 2:30. From there they sent us to the hospital for blood. This took until 9:30 that evening. One of the nurses stayed for 2 hours after her shift ended to make sure Steven was taken care of, since she knew with the long weekend coming up he wouldn't get the blood until Monday unless he went to the ER. If that had to happen she said they'd probably look at his levels and admit him again. She knew Steve didn't want that.
Thanks to all of you who have come to the rosary, said prayers, offered masses, brought food, and extended help and warm thoughts our way. It's amazingly comforting.
It's a good thing when we can communicate so easily with each other through the computer & cell phones (Adrian in Romania, Matt,the Dude, when he was Down Under,and Fr. O'Grady calling from Ireland to check in).
Steve has been watching the olympic track trials and I'm sure he wishes he could've been in Eugene with all of his old track buddies and coaches.
It is wonderful to hear he is doing well enough to go to family visits. That nurse is one person I would consider an angel... taking time out of her own life to make sure his is made a little better.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you, Jen, Tom, Jean, Amie and Ryan.
Love...Uncle Dan & Aunt Elaine
Hi Steve,
How are you doing today? I hope that your new treatment plan is working. Remember that my thoughts and prayers are ever with you. You are an inspiration to so many. God bless and keep you.
Love,
Aunt Diane
P.S. Let us hope that the U.S. Olympic track team does well.
I had promised myself that I wasn't going to write here anymore. I felt like I was taking advantage of this opportunity to do what I most love to do, write. But since the length will certainly tip off anyone who doesn't like what I write, I am only hurting those who decide to read this. Maybe it can be their penance.
Someone at the rosary tonight was telling me about a guy I went to Brophy with, all those years ago. He transferred in and had a very difficult time breaking in to all of the already formed groups. He said but for a couple of guys, his year there was less than enjoyable and certainly pretty lonely. Thinking back, it made me feel sad that he was treated this way. All of us who prided ourselves on being men for others should have looked around us.
As my immediate family knows, I went through a rather long period of doubting my faith. Actually, I lost it altogether. And I think in more ways than one, I have taken after my maternal grandfather. He was a convert and me coming back was almost the same as being converted. And like him, I think it has given me a special appreciation for faith.
Religion has taken a few hits lately. What has been done in the name of religion has caused a lot of hurt and pain to a lot of people. When I looked over the crowd today, it dawned on me that this is what religion, faith, is all about. This is what Sunday Mass should be like. A group of friends getting together and praying for one of their own. No rule says you need to be there. No one is getting extra credit. No one is fulfilling some sort of community service requirement. We are there out of love and out of faith. And our prayers are not only intercessionary, but prayers of support. Support for my brother's family for sure. But I think it goes beyond that. It is like some strong adhesive that bids us, any who wish to belong, together.
Which brings me back to the kid at Brophy. All of us who gather on Wednesday nights do not necessarily know each other. There are people whose lives have crossed with the lives of the Manos family in so many ways. I think if that Brophy kid would come out on one of these nights, he would find new friends so rapidly. But what puzzles me is why. Why would he feel so at home if he came and yet never assimilated at Brophy.
I think it hinges on our willingness to look for the "same" in each other instead of looking for that which makes us different. I think it is so easy to find what is different in a person. Their looks may not appeal to you. They may have voted for Bush. They may be of a different religion. And we rest on those differences to shut out people who may, no will, enrich our lives if we just get to know them. I cannot think of a more Christ-like behavior, than to welcome all with open arms.
The manner in which Steven has handled his situation is one of the most awe-inspiring things I have ever witnessed. And I just have to wonder if it is his prayers, his love that has brought us all together to pray as one for him. The whole thing,from Steven's approach to the communities' support, has been the most spititual thing I have ever witnessed. Watching the hugs, people who barely know the person they are huggung, is more a witness to the presence of the Holy Spirit than any Mass I have ever been to. That adhesive that I can only attribute to love/faith certainly makes us "one"
I am truly sorry for anytime in my life that I took the easy way out and scorned a future friendship by seeing the difference in someone. But I am not as sorry for that person, I am sure he got over it, as I am for myself.
I do believe one measure of how we did with the gift of life God bestowed upon us is by how many people call us their friend. Something you have done Steven, and it goes way beyond you illness, has helped all of us you have touched get that much closer. I hope there are more people now who would say I am a friend of theirs than there were a couple of months ago. And some I always felt were friends now share a whole new level of friendship.
I know we will never know why God does some of the things He does. And when they don't go our way, we can feel betwayed. There are none of us who wish we had to meet every Wednesday. But Steven, I hope you realize that you have made me a better person. You have made all of us better people. I hope in some small way this can lift your spirits a little. There are not too many of us who can say we have had that direct influence on so many.
I have always loved you. In a very Soprano way, you're my nephew, so of course I would love you. But I have grown to admire and respect you as someone way more than just being my nephew.
As Tom said, you are such a good kid.
Steve, Jen and family,
My love, prayers and my positive thoughts are headed your way. I hope to visit tomorrow night....I keep thinking of soft kisses and hugs.
Thanks to the amazing Community of Sts. Simon & Jude for helping our family during this difficult time. It means so much to all of us.
Peace and love....
Hi Steven,
It is your aunt again. I am sending you all of my love. Your courage and grace continue to amaze me. I think about you all of the time, and hope that with your new treatments that you are feeling better. I hope that it is not getting too hot for you guys down there. We have had a lot of rain, with temperatures mainly in the upper eighties during the day. God bless and keep you Steven. You have my continuous prayers.
Hugs and kisses,
Aunt Diane
Jim, your writing is an inspiration and should not stop.
We all have grown from having Steven and Jen in our family. I saw Mary Novotny at church yesterday and I sometimes wonder how we deserve such sincere and carimg friends. There are so many wonderful people praying with us and I am so grateful and humbled. Tom, Jean,Amie, Ryan and Jen, this is truly a terrible time but you have so many of us pulling for you.
I know you'll win this fight, Steven. Just hang in there because this world would be pretty lonely for me without you.
When I saw the Word Verification on this was 8 letters long I almost didn't post, but here goes... I thought I'd just relay Steve's words to me today to ya'll (for my southern relatives). "I slept well, once I fell asleep, and am feeling pretty good." That is typical of him. He is the easiest patient ever. I was thinking this morning that if he'd been this easy as a baby, and slept this much, I probably would've had 2 more kids. He sleeps, or plays opossum so we don't bug him, a lot of the day, but then again it is 12:45 and his younger brother, Ryan, is still in bed as well. Not that very different. Jenny has been doing a little teaching in Tucson at UA this week driving back and forth each day, so she, on the other hand, drives on catnap sleep. No justice involved here at all.
Just wanted to throw out to all you praying for Steven to add his cousin Danny to your list for the next couple of weeks that he passes the bar and finds a job that is a good fit for him and his family. He's a very smart fellow, but an extra pray or two is always good insurance.
2nd try... Jean
Hi Baby
Kalinihta, Saghapo......I was hoping to come for a short visit tonight, mainly for a soft kiss and your sweet smile, but for some reason, both Moochie and I were missing Poppie a lot this week, and I didn't feel that I would be good company. Poppie always loved it so much when it rained. Maybe tonight, is his way of telling us good things are coming your way!!!You so deserve it.....
Sweet dreams,
A.L.
Hey Moke, I hear today is a chemo day. I remember going with Mary to her chemo treatments and that seems so long ago. I know you'll get through this, just as she did.
Heard Ryan whipped some buts at basketball last night. He is probably too shy to brag but you guys have any excuses, Danny and Billy? Heard AJ was there too. High fives to all of you..what a nice night for Ryan.
Billy's name is in the Arizona Repulsive today. An article about the homeless bar-b-que next week that his firm is sponsoring. Any volunteers out there?
Gotta go, church is calling. I love you . This word verification is a joke. Gets longer and harder for these old eyes to see. We will find out later it's code for some porn site. Right Lindsay?
Hi Steve,
My love and prayers are with you! Hang in there. I will be away from work for a couple of weeks, but I will still be thinking about you every day and night. I hope that you are feeling better. My love to Jen too, for being such a support.
Hugs and kisses,
Aunt Diane
hi steven,
it's so good to hear that you've been able to relax and rest at home for what seems like quite a while now. it must be so nice to be around your family and jen.
thinking and praying for you in seattle!
lauren
Hey Steve.
Thought I should drop a line because I have not posted anything in a while (but, in fairness, neither have you). Not much new. Emmett and Marie were in LA for the 4th, so I got to see them. Of course, they returned to the Northwest well tanned, and I returned to my office looking like a tomato. As I said, nothing new.
You might be amused to know that at a recent firm event I passed on a cigar on your account. I'll never forgive you!
Hang in there. You remain on the short list of daily intentions.
Dom
Hi Sweetie,
Just wanted to say Good Night and I love you. Makenna is spending the night tonight, she is going to be my bunkhouse buddie. I think I'll go to bed early tonight, I am not sure when she will wake for her bottle.
It sure brings back memories of when Dan, you and Ted were all born within 6 months of each other. Can you imagine, me, Jean, and Aunt Mary all pregnant at the same time? Even though those times were hectic, I sure miss them.
Sleep tight tonight,
Love,
A.L.
Hi Steven,
How is it going for you? I hear that you have been able to get some rest lately. I hope so, and that it continues. I love you very much and continue to pray for you daily. Hang in there Steve. There are a lot of mighty prayer warriors on your side. God bless and keep you. Give my love to everyone.
Hugs and kisses,
Aunt Diane
I like the idea of "prayer warriors" who "come together in love and faith" to quote just a few of your favorite bloggers on this site. That is exactly what the Wednesday night rosary is all about. It is a bond of friends from all different aspects of Steven's life who gather weekly to pray for his healing, peace, comfort and decision-making.
Join us if you are in town at 7 p.m., Ss. Simon & Jude Church, 27th Avenue north of Bethany Home Road. If you are like me and missing out because you are out of town, just take time to pray at 7 p.m. on Wednesday. Hopefully Steven and his remarkable family will feel the power of our intentions.
We have been on the search for a primary care physician here in Phoenix since he returned the end of May. We went to a doctor today who, possibly not knowing his high heart rate history, sent Steven in an ambulance to the ER. Luckily, they hydrated him, gave him some Tylenol (which being such a mild drug they had trouble locating in the hospital - pretty funny), and we were home in time to catch the 13th - 15th innings of the All Star game.
I'm just sitting in a hotel in Texas for work, hoping you are relaxing and enjoying the summer evening with your loved ones.
Kevin
Hi Steve,
I've been running often lately since school is out and have decided that I will run because I am fortuntate enough to be able to do so.
Last week there were signs posted on my usual runs cautioning that bears have been seen on the trails. The first time I saw it I decided that no bear would hang out in the same spot for more than a day so I proceeded on, and then in the deepest part of the trail, the furthest from our house, I spooked myself into believing that there was a bear in the woods. I began to hightail it out of there as fast as I could and then chided myself for being so irresponsible.
The next few days I then decided that if you guys could brave the wilds of Volunteer Park and Ranier Ave, then I could run through suburban bear land.
We read your blog updates every day, don't want to overwhelm you with too many posts, but think about you, your family, and Jen constantly.
Paula
Hi Baby Doll,
I've been thinking about you all day, glad that you weren't admitted (which means "no sleep or rest") to the hopsital.
I know that the beds are more comfortable and the nursing staff is superior at home....
I am thinking soft kisses and hugs. I love you Steven Manos....and I couldn't be prouder of you, Jen and your family.
Sweet dreams....
Love you forever,
A.L.
Hi Baby,
Last night I stopped by to see Makenna and had a chance to visit with Aimee, Linds, Aunt Mary and Mary Beth. It was nice to see all the ladies-no offense to anyone listed above, but it was especially nice to see Makenna. She is growing so fast, and her hair is growing by leaps and bounds. Unlike Aimers when she was that age...
There was a picture of Ryan and Maizie (I think is was Maizie) in a big back yard. I looked at it and said "oh, this is Steven and Kingsly in the backyard on Elm". Mary said no, it was Ryan. I couldn't believe how much it looked like you. I remember when your Mom and Dad had a Halloween party in the Elm house. Billy was all dressed up as a cowboy. Funny, I can't remember what Danny or you were.....I think Danny probably had some silly store bought costume, but your Mom always made you and Aimee the greatest costumes.
Anyway, I am sending all my love and positive energy your way. Please give Jen and family my love.
Peace and Painless Days...
Love,
A.L.
question of the day: where have all the bloggers gone (Teddy, Danny, Billy, Linds,Ellen, Liz, Wacky, Amie,and Ryan and all the
Scott girls. I know Jen reads the blog to Steven and how much he enjoys it. Come on Bean and Jim. I miss hearing from you guys. I know Steven had chemo today but Ihaven't checked with Jean yet.Thank all for sending their good thoughts and prayers.
There's nothing like getting called out by your grandmother on a blog. What a hip lady she is.
Danny
Hi Baby Doll,
Just wanted to say Kalinihta, Saghapo.....
Peace,
A.L.
P.S.
Danny you are exempt from Maw-Maw's comments. Studying for the Bar and parenting Makenna is your job for now....love, mom
Hi Sweetie,
I was reading the St. Mary's Newsletter and found a couple of things in it, I wanted to tell you.
Mike Rush is back in Iraq, so I am sending lots of prayers his way.
Also, they are building a Catholic University in Avondale. They say at capacity, there will be 3000 students. The are also building a all girls catholic high school, and an all boys as well.
The most exciting article, though I know nothing about track, other than you were the Super Hero was about a St. Mary's graduate that (I'll just quote the article for you) --- here goes; "Senior Alyssa Lout completed an outstanding career as a Lady Knight runner and will be moving her talent to Seattle University next year to compete for the Redhawks. Alyssa's accomplishments included several record setting performances in five events this year; the 100
(2.6 sixth in the State meet), the 200 (25.46 third at State), the 400(58.83), the 800 (2:29.66) and the 4x800 relay team (10:48.80).
Those numbers mean nothing to me, but I know they will to you. What I think is amazing, St. Mary's track and field program is rather new...I think.
Anyway, it was nice to hear about the Redhawks track and field...hope she does as well as you did there....
Signing off to get a cup of java...talk to you soon....
Love,
A.L.
Oops, forgot to tell you and Jen and family, that if you are bored or need an uplifting experience, Mary Beth created a blog for Makenna and updates weekly. Mary Beth, I hope it's okay with you to share, but since I am a beaming grandmother, I look at the blog at least twice a day. It also gives you a feel for how creative Mary can be at writing.
Anyway, the blog is "makennaking.blogspot"
I guarantee it will put a smile on yours and Jen's faces....love!!
Hi Steven,
It's a rainy Saturday morning in Chicago and I was just thinking about how you're doing. Then I saw Annabelle's shout out- sorry for the lack of Scott girl presence!! Just know that I'm constantly praying for you and your family.
Also- Mary, Danny and Lynn- I saw Little Mak's Blog and it was adorable and hilarious. She's already so cool- having her own blog and all-I can't wait to meet her!
Hopefully sending some rain and cooler weather to all of you in AZ!
Love,
Kelly
Hi Steven,
I think of you every day even if I don't post that often. In a couple of weeks we will be in Montana with the Jim Scotts. Reminds me of Montana trips and camping trips with you guys. Remember how we would always put on huge plays for all the parents. You were an excellent co-leader (being the other oldest child). Just know we are all rooting for you and all of us Scotts love you alot.
Love,
Jessie
So you've got your Mom conned, Dan. Are there any questions regarding your agility playing Wii on the bar exam?
Hi Steven,
This is your aunts Elaine, Diane and Cindi. We hope you feel many prayers coming your way. We had a get together with some of our cousins today. We ended our visit by joining hands in a circle of prayer for our family members and included you in a very special way. We all love you so very much. We hope that you had a good day. God bless you. All of our love to you, Jean, Tom, Amie, Ryan and Jen.
Hugs and kisses,
Your aunts.
Good night Sweetheart, I love you so much...talk to you tomorrow. Love to Jen and the family!
Peace,
A.L.
I was showing Jenny some of Steve's old pictures from various stages of his life, and we ran across an article from SU's newspaper regarding the cross country team. It was his freshman year,Sept. 2000,and the subtitle was, "Pushing the Limits of Endurance." Watching what he is currently going through, and wondering how many meters he has left to go, I am shocked at how, just now, I'm truly comprehending the correlation to his running. Even though through this whole trial he and his fellow runners have tied the two together seamlessly.
Steve had many years with running to get in tune with his body in a very deep way. To push himself to the limits of endurance. To prepare him for this fight of his life.
Here are his quotes from the article:
"You figure you might as well give it all you have because you only have 200 or 300 meters to go. You don't want to finish the race and realize, 'Man, I could have gone a little bit harder or a little bit faster.' You want to finish the race and feel like 'I gave it all I had. I'm proud of the performance I had.'"
They go on to talk about how he should be proud of his performance and end the article with this quote:
Manos reflects, "It's the ultimate test of the human spirit to see who can find the most in them to keep on going, even when your hurting."
We all know who the winner is Steven. No matter how this race ends...it's you. With love, Mom
Dear Jeanie,
Thanks for sharing that article. I remember reading it...I was at work and my Dad emailed the link to me. He was so darn proud.
If we tried our hardest to come up with the perfect description on how Steven has lived his life, we couldn't have said it better.
Love to you all-soft kisses to Steven....
A.L.
But why God, did you pick Steven for the ultimate test? Just how much can one person endure? I love you so much Steven. Would that it could be me. Maw Maw
I have tried everything I can think of to get a post to go through. For some reason it won't accept my password. So I do a new password, and it still won't accept. Sometimes there is a miracle and it goes through, so I thought I would try again today. It's Sunday so what better day for a miracle?!
You are constantly in our thoughts and prayers, Steve, as well as our Jenny. Wish so much we didn't live so far away, but Gordon has been talking of another trip there, so we'll see.
Thanks so much to you Steve, and to your family and all of you for your love for Jenny. So many times I just want to hug her, and it is a great comfort to me to know she has you wonderful people there.
Special people touch our hearts. Jenny has always been one of those special people to me, then she brought Steve into our lives and I wondered how these two found each other in this crazy world. I love this poem, and many have heard parts, but I wanted to share with you the complete work. It reminds me of both of you and your sweet spirits.
Some People
By Flavia Weedn
Some people come into our lives
and leave footprints on our hearts
and we are never ever the same.
Some people come into our lives
and quickly go...
Some stay for a while and embrace our silent dreams.
They help us become aware of the delicate winds of hope...
and we discover within every human spirit there are wings yearning to fly.
They help our hearts to see that
the only stairway to the stars
is woven with dreams...
and we find ourselves unafraid to reach high.
They celebrate the true essence
of who we are...
and have faith in all that we may become.
Some people awaken us to new and deeper realizations...
for we gain insight from the passing whisper of their wisdom.
Throughout our lives we are sent
precious souls...
meant to share our journey. However brief or lasting their stay they remind us why we are here.
To learn...to teach...to nurture...to love.
Some people come into our lives
to cast a steady light upon our path
and guide our every step.
Their shining belief in us helps us to believe in ourselves.
Some people come into our
lives to teach us about love...
the love that rests within ourselves.
Let us reach out to others and feel the bliss of giving...
for love is far richer in action
than it ever is in words.
Some people come into our lives
and they move our souls to sing
and make our spirits dance.
They help us to see that everything on earth is part of the incredibility of life...
and that it is always there
for us to take of its joy.
Some people come into our lives
and leave footprints on our hearts
and we are never ever the same.
You are both so special to us. We love you.
Gordon and Joan
Jean,
As of one the two people who stood on the track and timed those intense workouts at least 5 hours each week, I know that you are correct about in tune with his body and spirit he is able to be.
Throughout all of this, one of things that we remember most is Steve during a last set of 400s on the track, or a final hill repeat, or the last 800 of a solid cross country race when he would look up with big eyes, take a huge breath and then relax in order to make it through the pain. Ask Steve if Rodney Yea had anything to do with such moments of calmness while in pain, he may smile at the thought of Rodney! I always come back to the idea of when Steve ran his best, it was grace under pressure....
Paula
hey steven -
i heard you were having kinda a rough day and i just wanted to let you know i am thinking of you.
although i didnt get to speak with them, i saw your mom and brother last week at church. they came in a little late (surprise surprise) but it was good to see them anyhow :)
ellen and pat are currently flying back from a music festival where they were lucky enough to see Michael Franti. one of my favorite lines of his goes as such, "a piece of peace for you, a piece of peace for me, a piece of peace for everyone..." hopefully everyone is able to find a small piece of peace in something in this coming week.
sending love to you all.
lizzie
"Don't give up, don't ever give up" - Jimmy V.
I love you Steven!
Hi Sweetie Pie,
It's so amazing to me how many people are pulled together because of you and Jen.
I am so sad (and angry) that you have to endure so much. The only redeeming thought is that God sent an angel to walk next to you through this journey. To love you unconditionally, to smile when you smile, to hurt when you hurt, to laugh with you, to rub your legs, and to care for you with her whole heart. For this I am so grateful.
Please give your angel a kiss for me, and I hope you have a painless night.
I love you so much Steven.
A.L.
Just a little shout out from the Jim Scott crew.
We may be on the other side of the country, but we're thinking about you and sending love your way.
Thinking a lot about you today...I love you all.
Kimmy
Steven,
My thoughts are with you today. It is so wonderful you have so many loved ones around you day in and day out. The poem Joan posted is AMAZING! I cried like a little baby, which I often do reading the loving comments your family and friends have written. This blog was such a wonderful idea, I just wish words came easier. I love you so much! Many blessings to Jean, Tom, Amy, Ryan, Jen and of course you. You are in my heart.
Laura
One of the days that I have thought about so much lately is the day Tom and I took you and Elz to ASU to register for your first Ironkids triathalon. Both of you were so little. Elz was about six so that would put you at seven. The image that keeps running through my brain just as clearly as if it had been captured on Youtube is Tom taking you up to the registration table and saying, "This is my son, Steven." I know it doesn't sound like much, but if you could see the pride in Tom's eyes, the pride I can see so clearly, you would understand why that image has stuck with me.
I think your fight with dignity through all of this has multiplied that pride a hundred times over. There is not one of us who isn't proud that we share you last name.
Hi Steve,
It was good to read your post. I've been thinking about you and praying for you.
Stan
Hi Steven and all,
I just thought i'd share a funny (and sadly true) anecdote from my library. Apparently the other day some guy called and wanted to find a "real life, live, sound recording of dinosaurs." Yep.
Hope that helps to brighten your day. Oh and mad respect for the ironkids at the young age of 6 and 7, Steven and Ellen!! I feel athletic when I walk to get the mail.
Love,
Jessie
Hi Baby Doll,
I was disappointed to hear that you are back in the hospital, but from what I understand, the docs think that they can make your breathing easier. If that is the case, than I am all for it-just as long as you can get some rest. I know how hard it is to sleep in a hospital.
I am working tonight, but I will be sending all my positive thoughts your way. My love to Jen and the family.
Love you to pieces....
A.L.
Jesse,
I had a customer call Macy's one day when it was raining, who asked me to go outside and see how full the parking lot was?????
Thanks to all the Scott girls for your postings!
Hey Steven,
Man on man those Ironkids triathalons were a lot of fun, but don't feel bad Jessie, I think I walked my bike and my butt more than half the race...
I did get to go to an amazing weekend of music and was reminded of some of the greatness that exists in music. Michael Franti was killer and about halfway through the set he stopped and asked everyone to look at the sunset over the Denver mountains...what a breathtaking experience. He can command a crowd with peace....what a novel idea. You have done something similar to those you have touched in your family and all around. It is evident here. I am sorry for my blogging absence...I was not sure whether or not you still read it, but I still think about you daily.
Love you so much,
Elz
yo manhands
that hippy dippy acid rock Manfred Mann and the Earth Band song, "blinded by the light" always reminds me of you. keep on dude. and no when he says duce he isnt saying douche. that could very well be taken the wrong way.
as always,
madi
Jessie:
What kind of library doesn't have live recordings of dinosaurs? I thought W made that a mandatory feature of all libraries.
concerned about the state of libraries,
Danny
Just a friendly reminder that tomorrow night is our Wednesday night rosary that continues to be held weekly at Ss. Simon & Jude Church. Come on all you friends and prayer warriors. I think Steven, his family and his doctors can probably use our prayers more than ever right now. I can't help but think the intensity of our prayer has helped Steven endure his pain, fight with dignity, and find peace in his journey. Join us if you can at 7 p.m. If you aren't in town, join us anyway in prayer. We love you Steven.
My favorite Ironkids moment was Mickey's first. He was coming in on the run and I realized he was in second place. In something so typical Mickey, he could not have cared less what place he was in. He was having a blast running. I went up and started jogging next to him. He started to slow down so he could talk to me. I had to tell him he was in second place and I mentioned if he went faster he might win. I could tell by the smile on his face that winning meant nothing to him. He resumed running, no slower but no faster. That single event describes Mick better than anything I could ever say.
I know that was not Steven's approach to running. Although I am sure you enjoyed it, you have a lot of your dad in you. You just have never liked having someone in front of you. I think that has kept you in this race.
Hi Baby Doll,
Just got home from work and wanted to say good night and I love you....
Hey Steven!
I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you everyday buddy. Its been an interesting summer. I went to the Olympic Trials to watch some of my current club mates run. I actually talked to a few studs, Nick Symmonds, Christian Smith, Solinsky, Riley. All pretty cool dudes. I tell you the most crazy part was the 10k when Abdi wins and takes a swim in the steeple pit after. Not to mention Throwing on his "Black Cactus" T-shirt. It was interesting to see a guy who can be so tough and yet have a sense of humor. That reminded me of you and the calvary. I also came across a picture of PRE in a quite humorous team moment. I'll have to send it to you. Fight hard Steve! My prayers are with you.
-Carlos
Steven is back in the hospital and struggling. He can't seem to relax, so I know the fight is still in him.
I don't know who is leading the rosary tomorrow, but I'll probably be at the hospital. You old faithfuls who are still in town may have to take over since Mary Heiland and Tricia are both out of town. By now you know the prayers. Jean
Jeanie,
I was so sorry to see your post this morning. I wish more than anything Steven would be more comfortable. My heart aches for all of you. If there is anything I can do, please call...or have Amie call....
My love to Steven and Jen....
Will you also tell my brother, how much I love him...
Love,
Hi Steve,
Apparently you're back in the hospital yet again. It's clear you're battling an enemy that just doesn't let up. I'm thinking about you every day, and I've been worrying that I haven't seen a post here for a while. I hope you're still seeing or hearing of all the support you're getting here from so many people who love you and are pulling for you.
I thought you might like to know that the Steven Manos Scholarship Fund has already picked up more than $10,000 since I sent an email to the faculty announcing its formation Monday evening. We're all hoping that the first recipient of a Manos Scholarship is Steve Manos, when he goes on the job market in two or three years.
I know you're in a terrible battle. Please know we're all behind you 100%.
-- Mark
The Lybarger house is praying for you Steve.
Kevin
hi steven,
i'm thinking and praying for you here in seattle. i hope this hospital visit is short and you leave stronger.
take care,
lauren
Steven, Jean & Tom,
Although I'm not in town, I'll be praying at 7:00 and sending you all positive thoughts and love.
Kathy Mc-Zywicki
Steve -
I just saw the update that you are back in the hospital. I am with 2 other Jesuits on retreat and we will offer Mass for you tomorrow morning.
Fr. Mike, SJ
Steve,
You are such an inspiration to me and many others.
You have shown me, your family and friends that love, faith, hope and peace can be achieved no matter what life throws at you.
If you are able to visit my blog you will see that I have given you a blog award.... it is dedicated to you and those that love you.
Hi Sweetie,
I hope and pray that you have a good day today. Jen said that you were talking more and smiling more yeterday. I hope that continues.
I know how much we all enjoy your "shy" smile, but Jen and fam definety deserve to see it as much as the can. It makes everyone's heart sing...I love you baby doll.
Peace and a painless day,
A.L.
Yesterday Steven suddenly decided he wanted to have a sip of my iced tea; unexpected since he hasn't taken anything in orally for a long time in fear of aspirating it into his lungs. He had his throat stretched twice and swallow tests done saying he could take in clear liquids if he coughed after every couple of sips, but it was a risk he didn't want to take. From the tea he asked for Gatorade which Tom left immediately to hunt down, and it just kept on going. Amie walked in drinking a diet Coke and he wanted to try that (something I don't think he ever would've drank before). Then his grandma came in and she ran all over the hospital to get him something and came back with pink lemonade. Each person that came to visit went on a mission to get him something new...anything he wanted really. Ryan ran and found him a Fanta orange soda and later a Sprite. Jen brought back apple juice, and I got him a Dr. Pepper. In the end he tasted everything he wanted but hot chocolate. Maybe today. It was a sip and spit, but you could tell he savored tasting things for the first time in a long time. When I left last night his nurse was giving him ice chips to chew on. I don't know when the last time was he chewed on anything. For the last 3 nights he's had the same nurse who was so good to him (along with Jenny). He set Jenny up with a cot in his room right away and has bent over backwards to make them both comfortable. All in all it was a good day for him. Jean
Hey Baby,
Just wanted to tell you how much I love you. I know it's probably been hard for you to be in the hospital, but I was so happy when Maw-Maw told me about your being able to sip on some cold drinks.
Enjoy the time with Jen and your family. Talk to you tomorrow...
Love,
A.L.
P.S. I will use the spell checker tonight, sorry for all the typos in my last post!
I love you all so much. You are in my thoughts this sad evening . . . I will see you soon.
Hey, Steven Manos,
Thank You.
Thank You and Godspeed.
-Matt
Thinking of you all and wishing you peace.
Lots of love,
Mary G.
My thoughts and prayers are with the Manos family and friends. I don't know a nicer young man than Steve.
Steve, Thank you for everything!
You are all in my thoughts today. I love you. XOXOXO Laura
Steve was a wonderful young man. My deepest condolences to his family and to Jenny. My thoughts are with you.
All of our prayers go out to Steve and his family. He was a truly incredible guy. Steve, you will be missed a lot buddy.
I will remember running with the guys along the canal and Steve would still be cracking jokes while the rest of us could hardly catch our breath. I will remember seeing him in the law library down at U of A because he said he could not study in his cubicle at the business school. I will remember the quiet courage in his voice the last time we chatted over the phone.
I will remember his dry wit, warm smile and kind heart. Thanks for being my friend Stevie. Keep a watch over us man.
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